Nollywood actress Tayo Adeniyi has urged women to stop making marriage and children the centre of their lives and self-worth.
In a video shared on her Instagram page on Wednesday, the actress specifically addressed women in their late 30s and 40s who have struggled to find a partner or have children despite their efforts. She encouraged them to prioritise personal fulfilment over societal pressure.
“Please, de-centre marriage. You do not have to get married and you do not have to have kids also,” she said.
Adeniyi stressed that a complete and meaningful life does not depend on having a husband or children.
“If you’re in your 40s and you’ve tried your best to find a man to be married or perhaps you’re married and you haven’t got any kids, please, I beg you, you can be whole without these things. You can be a whole you without having kids, without having a man in your life. Just get your life together. A whole life doesn’t have to be with a man or with kids.”
She warned against staying in unhealthy situations simply to meet expectations.
“Don’t put up with nonsense because you want to be married or because you want to have children. Don’t. It’s not worth it. Don’t go out of your way to have these things. If it does not come naturally, let it go. Trust me, if it’s going to happen, it will happen and if it is not happening, there’s absolutely nothing you can do to make it happen.”
The actress added that happiness remains possible either way.
“You can be happy without children. You can be happy without a husband. Life has changed. Seasons have changed.”
In a follow-up Instagram post, she clarified her message.
“Decentralising marriage and children means refusing to make them the center of your worth. They can be beautiful blessings, but they are not the only measure of a meaningful life. Purpose, peace, service, growth, and love also create a life that matters. Please love yourself first, you are enough.”
Adeniyi’s advice comes amid ongoing conversations about the heavy societal expectations placed on women regarding marriage and motherhood in Nigeria. Her call for self-love and alternative sources of meaning has sparked discussions among fans, especially women, who appreciate the reminder that personal value exists independently of traditional milestones.