Controversial actress and evangelist Tonto Dikeh has ignited fresh debate in the Nigerian faith community after calling out Christian men for using spiritual language as an excuse to avoid genuine effort in courtship and relationships.
In a passionate Instagram video that has gone viral, the outspoken star urged men seeking marriage to stop relying on phrases like “God told me you are my wife” while putting in minimal work to woo and win a woman’s heart.
“Why do church brothers think church sisters don’t require gifts? What about this low-effort thing you put into wooing or pursuing a woman that you have to be saying God sent me to you?” Tonto questioned.
“God can send you, but using spiritual language to mask emotional laziness is a distortion of God’s character. Saying, ‘God told me you are my wife,’ is not an excuse to bypass intentionality and practical effort; true pursuit requires investment,” she added firmly.
The mother of one, who has become more vocal about her Christian faith in recent years, argued that true courtship demands real investment of time, attention, and resources. She challenged men who hide behind spirituality instead of showing up consistently and thoughtfully in a woman’s life.
Her message has struck a chord with many women who have experienced low-effort pursuit masked as “God’s will,” while also prompting discussions among Christian men about what genuine spiritual leadership in relationships looks like.
Tonto’s latest outburst comes against the backdrop of her own public journey through faith, personal storms, and outspoken advocacy.
This time, her call for accountability in Christian dating circles has resonated with many who feel tired of empty spiritual declarations without corresponding actions.