I Had to Walk Away: Monalisa Stephen on Surviving Abuse and Knowing Her Worth

Monalisa Stephen is an actress, content creator, and model, known for her fearless advocacy for body positivity and diversity, particularly for plus-sized women in Nollywood. In an industry where beauty standards often exclude women like her, she’s carved out her own space by challenging stereotypes and pushing for better representation of diverse body types.

Despite facing obstacles like being typecast or overlooked, Monalisa remains undeterred, using her platform to promote visibility and equality. Her personal experiences, including surviving an abusive relationship, have shaped her journey and made her an inspiring voice for women knowing their worth. She opens up on her journey in this interview with the Entertainment Reporter

As a plus-sized actress in Nollywood, do you feel the industry embraces body diversity, or do you think there’s still a lot of progress to be made?

 It’s been a long journey advocating for fat body acceptance and diversity in the industry. While there has been some improvement, honestly, there isn’t much difference between now and when I first started. As a fat talent, you have to work three times harder, or even more, just to land one or two roles. It’s sad. How many fat talents do you see on screen in Nigeria, where the majority of women are size 14 or more? We are such a visible part of the population, but our representation is almost non-existent.

Some of us are pushing, advocating for diversity, and not giving up, but in a sane world, why should I have to fight this hard for my talent to be seen? It’s frustrating, but we keep pushing. There’s still so much progress to be made, but the advocacy for body positivity isn’t stopping anytime soon.

Have you ever felt stereotyped in the kinds of roles you’re offered because of your body size, and how do you navigate those challenges?

Absolutely. I’ve faced a lot of stereotyping because of my size. There have been times when I’ve been asked to play older women, even though I’m clearly younger than the character they’re portraying. Other times, I’ve been overly sexualized in roles that didn’t need it—simply because some people see fat women as easy targets. They think we’re easy to prey on or exploit, and that’s just wrong.

As an actor, I know I can play any role, so I navigate these challenges by sometimes twisting the narrative to suit my strengths. I make sure my performance shines through, regardless of how others see me. I’m here to change perceptions, and I always remind myself that Gabacci—me, Monalisa Stephen—will always be fine. [laughs]

You’ve been open about being assaulted by your ex-boyfriend. What lessons did that experience teach you, both personally and professionally?

 That experience taught me so many important lessons. First and foremost, never date anyone who is below your standards unless you’re sure they don’t have low self-esteem and aren’t a narcissist. It’s vital to always date a kind man—someone who values and respects you. I also learned that it’s never advisable to date someone in the same field as you. It can create complications. Sure, some people are lucky, but it’s not something I’d recommend.

One of the biggest lessons I learned was to speak up when you’re being abused. Don’t stay silent, and know when to walk away. You’re not a tree; you can move, and you deserve better. Always remember that you’re the prize, and if someone doesn’t see that, they’re not for you.

How do you maintain confidence and body positivity in an industry that often sets narrow beauty standards?

Confidence for me is inbuilt; it’s who I am. I don’t understand when people praise me for being confident—it’s like praising me for eating. Confidence comes naturally to me. I look at myself, my body, and I know that I am the beauty standard. I’m not worried about fitting into society’s narrow standards of beauty.

Gone are the days when you needed a godfather to get ahead in this industry. These days, all you need are people who love and appreciate your work and content. And that’s why I continue to push for body positivity. It’s what I love doing—it’s my way of making the world a better place. My confidence isn’t something I think about; it’s just me being me.

What advice would you give to young women, especially plus-sized women, looking to break into Nollywood or any other competitive industry?

My advice to any young woman, especially plus-sized women, is to be yourself—be you-ti-ful! Always remember that you are the prize, so don’t let anyone make you feel less than that. Stay focused on your goals and don’t get distracted by what others are doing or saying. People are watching, and one day, you’ll get your big break.

Believe in yourself and don’t let the world’s opinions shape who you are. Focus on your strengths and what you bring to the table. The industry may be tough, but if you stay true to who you are and keep pushing, you’ll get to where you want to be.